Funny jokes for Whatsapp: Hindi Jokes | जोक्स इन हिन्दी | really funny joke
bhartee prakriya
ejensee: mahoday, hamen apanee aavashyakataon ke anusaar 3 ummeedavaar mile, ab aap unakee niyukti kaise chaahate hain sar?
em dee: ek band kamare mein lagabhag 100 eenten rakho. phir ummeedavaaron ko kamare mein bhej den aur daravaaza band karen, unhen akela chhod den aur kuchh ghanton ke baad vaapas aaen aur sthiti ka vishleshan karen:
1) yadi ve eenton kee ginatee kar rahe hain, to unhen khaate vibhaag mein rakhen
2) yadi ve eenton kee phir se ginatee kar rahe hain, to unhen oditing mein rakhen
3) yadi unhonne eenton ke saath poore kamare mein gadabadee kee hai, to unhen injeeniyaring mein rakhen
4) agar ve kuchh ajeeb aadesh mein eenton ka prabandh kar rahe hain, to unhen yojana mein rakhen
5) yadi ve ek doosare par eenton ko phenk rahe hain, to unhen opareshan mein rakhen.
6) agar ve so rahe hain, unhen suraksha mein rakhen
7) yadi unhonne eent ko tukadon mein tod diya hai, to unhen soochana praudyogikee mein daal diya hai
8) agar ve bekaar baithe hain, to unhen maanav sansaadhan mein rakh den
9) yadi ve kahate hain ki unhonne vibhinn sanyojanon kee koshish kee hai, to abhee tak ek bhee eent ko sthaanaantarit nahin kiya gaya hai, unhen bikree mein daal diya gaya hai
10) yadi ve pahale hee din ke lie chhod chuke hain, to unhen maarketing mein daalen.
11) yadi ve khidakee se baahar ghoor rahe hain, to unhen saamarik yojana mein rakhen
tatha.......
12) yadi ve ek doosare se baat kar rahe hain aur ek bhee eent ko chhua nahin gaya hai, to unhen badhaee deejie aur unhen sheersh prabandhan mein daal diya hai.
majedaar
ek rimot rodahaus hotal mein yah ek shaant raat hai jab ek ardh-trelar kheenchata hai aur trokee baar mein paseena karata hai aur vhiskee kee maang karata hai vah ise neeche jhukata hai aur turant doosare ke lie poochhata hai, jo vah ek baar mein naaliyaan bhee karata hai. jab vah teesare ke lie poochhata hai to barman usase poochhata hai ki use itana pareshaan kyon kiya gaya hai.
trakakee kasam khaata hai aur bataatee hai ki vah raajamaarg par ek suar maara hai aur vah apane bail-baar mein phans gaya hai, aur ab bhee jeevit hai!
ve kahate hain, "har baar jab main laanat suar kee chillaata hai aur mere lie jaane kee koshish karata hoon, main use baahar nahin nikaal sakata."
"aah," barman kahate hain, "koee samasya nahin hai, mujhe aapaka uttar mil gaya hai" aur baar ke neeche se ek .303 ka utpaadan karata hai. vah bataate hain, "apanee aankhon ke beech mein se ek ko rakho aur vah sahee nikal jaenge".
trak ne raiphal pakad liya aur baahar chala gaya aur ek shot suna hai. vaapas trak aatee hai aur ek aur vhiskee kee maang karatee hai, aur usake baad doosara.
barman poochhate hain, "samasya kya hai," kya yah kaam nahin karatee? "
"oh, yah theek kaam kiya," trakakee javaab deta hai, "suar kee koee chinta nahin hai ... ab main usaka khoonee motarasaikil nahin pa sakata!"
majedaar
bad lait aur mithaee chaay
ek mahila sabhee kaale aur neele rang ke doktar ke paas jaatee hai.
doktar: kya hua?
mahila: doktar, mujhe nahin pata ki kya karana hai. har baar jab mere pati bad lait par nashe mein ghar aate hain to mujhe maarata hai
doktar: mere paas ek asalee achchhee dava hai i jab aapaka pati bad lait par nashe mein ghar aata hai, to mithaee chaay ka ek gilaas le lo aur ise apane munh mein ghusana shuroo kar den, lekin nigal nahin. bas svipht aur svipht rakhen jab tak ki vah apane bad lait slepar mein bistar par nahin jaata.
do haphte baad mahila vaapas taaja aur punarjanm dekhane vaale doktar ke paas aatee hai.
mahila: doktar jo ek shaanadaar vichaar tha har baar jab mere pati bad lait par nashe mein aae, to mainne mithaee chaay ke saath choos liya. main choos liya aur choos liya, aur usane mujhe chhoo nahin diya!
doktar: aap dekh rahe hain ki aapaka munh band karane mein kitana madad karata hai?
shaadee
patnee ka shaanadaar badala
mere priy pati ke lie,
apane videshee yaatra se vaapas aane se pahale, main bas aapako sadak ke raaste mein pikap trak ke saath hone vaale chhote durghatana ke baare mein bataana chaahata hoon.
saubhaagy se bahut bura nahin hai aur main vaastav mein chot nahin pahuncha, isalie krpaya mere baare mein bahut chinta mat karo.
main vol-maart se ghar aa raha tha, aur jab main sadak ke raaste mein badal gaya to mainne brek kee bajaay galatee se tvarak ko dhakka diya.
geraaj ka daravaaza thoda mota hai, lekin pikap apane pheraaree mein takaraate samay saubhaagy se ruka hua tha.
mujhe sach mein khed hai, lekin main apane dil se vyakt vyaktitv ke saath jaanata hoon aap mujhe maaf karenge
aap jaanate hain ki main aapase kitana pyaar karata hoon aur aap ke lie meree pyaaree dekhabhaal karata hoon
main tumhaare lie ek tasveer sanlagn kar raha hoon. main phir se apanee baahon mein pakad karane ke lie intajaar nahin kar sakata.
aapakee pyaaree patnee
anulekh aapakee premika ne phon kiya